The Top Ten Fashion Faux Pas We All Had from the 90s

I thought I’d do a ‘blast from the past’ post, this week, seeing as it brings back a lot of good memories about being a 90s child, not to mention all those great kids shows and cheap 1p sweets we used to have. Sure there were rubbish stuff too (like , but from the generation that gave us Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Are You Afraid of the Dark and the classic literature (read: terrible) that are Fear Street books, the 90s were really just one big rave (with 90s trance music).19

So its inevitable when looking back with these rose-tinted glasses that we also remember the awful, awful fashion trends we all had. And yes, we all did it. We all wore the sparkly tiaras with leggings and jumper dresses (wait, that sounds like fashion from today. Recycling trends, of course not!) We  had the neon, glow-in-the dark t-shirts , the plastic Walkman headphones with the horrible curtain hair style (be still my beating heart, *swooooon*) with the heft Air Nikes, which boys clomped down the street in, either posing as Brian from the Backstreet Boys or er, Coolio.

And I’ll also confess, between being dressed by my mother and also being ‘adventurous’ with my own fashion choice, I mostly looked like a crazy troll doll. At least I was oblivious to it at the time, and that’s what counts.  So that you can all share the pain too, here’s the Top Ten fashion faux from the 90s, whether you wore them proudly and loudly or hid in your room and dressed up.

1. Floppy hats aka Blossom-style, or what I call lids-for-empty-heads. I hated those hats. See below for example. Mind you, I used to wear woolly hats as a teenager during my goth/grunger phase, so I can’t really talk there. But still, whenever I look back on these big man-hats (and not cool man-hats either, like a decent top hat) I think of the good-girl next door look. This girl had an unhealthy obsession with floral hats, I tell you. I think I vaguely remember one of my sisters trying this look, but it must not have stuck (and I don’t have any photographic evidence to laugh at her every day remind her with.
Ugh. Goddarn cheesy hats.

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2.  Brown lipstick. More specifically, (and even worse) that dark lip-liner outline look. I hated that look. In fact, I still do. I know it was meant to look hot at the time (and thank god I was too young to be bothered about make-up at the time), but it just had the effect of looking like you drew outside the lipline and it was waiting to be filled in, like a colouring book. I have a friend who still wears her make-up like this, and WILL NOT LISTEN TO ME when I tell her to lighten up with the deep clashing lipliner with an opposite colour inside. This trend is one reason why I never wore anything brown for a very, very, long time : (

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3. Light up trainers. Anyone who was anyone, had one. Okay, not anyone, just all the little kids, but it was fun sliding down the slippery shopping mall floors and lighting up. Pity they only came in red lights. Presenting the kids answer for what to use if there is ever a blackout.

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4. Stick on earrings, one for every day of the month! Probably aimed at those of us girlies who were unfortunate enough to have mothers who didn’t think pierced ears were for little girls or something, I can’t really relate to be honest, my mum had my ears pierced a baby so they’d be done and over with, so these were kind of a pointless novelty for me. I do remember having swirly bright pink and green round stickers in different shapes, which we used to stick everywhere on books and on our skin. Although if these stayed on for longer than three minutes without the use of superglue, it was a miracle. Even more fun, my sister and I would experiment with them as bindhis, and then make fun out of each other for looking stupid when they fell off.

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5. Stirrup leggings. Sound like horse clothes, don’t they? Personally, I never wore them because I was never allowed, but remember a lot of girls wearing these in my class, and wondering whether the strappy bits were comfortable (they didn’t look it),  I always worried that you might trip up on your owns straps of the elasticky pants (and maybe yank your pants down in the  proces), although this never happened to anyone I knew – but they didn’t look entirely flattering either.

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6. Fanny packs (we just called them bum bags). Oh my god. I won’t even go into this one.

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7. Platform shoes, for all us short girls. I remember my sister wearing this to high school every day (Kickers shoes, yay!) and then losing about a foot in height when she came home and took them off. Funnily enough, I see a lot of Goths wearing them these days, but I don’t think they mean to be ironic about it. I used to have platform sandals which I wore in the late 90s (I was a bit late, I know) which I wore every day for about a month until I just threw them away because I felt a bit deceptive about relative praising me about how ‘big and tall’ I looked (Asians value weird things, I tell you).

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8. Leotards. Another item which I (thankfully) never wore, but saw plenty of in my youth. I remember seeing these being worn as tops with cut-off jeans or just trousers, but they just looked….like leotards under jeans. Funnily enough, this is one of the typical ‘American’ outfit which I associate with the 90s, although most women who weren’t Hpllywood stars just looked like they’d finished doing gymnastics at P.E. time rather than a male fantasy.

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9. Blue contact lenses. This doesn’t sound as bad, unless you remember that I’m Pakistani and everyone around me is, well, brown. So it’s not a big leap to assume someone is wearing contacts when they turn up one day with dazzling baby blues, (or in the case of one guy we knew, one green contact lense with demo written across it. I kid you not). Granted, this was more of a late-nineties-to-noughties thing, but that doesn’t make it any less tack, it was a terrible look then, and still is now.

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Yes Shahrukh, those must be your real eyes.

10 The epitome of the 90s look: shell suits. I had one, my sisters had one, my brother had one, heck, if we had a family pet, it would have had a mini one sewn by my mum. While they were very, em, comfy, they were also very bright, plasticky-looking and noisy, not to mention making you look like Vicky Pollard in co-ordinated shoes and accessories. I cringe mightily.

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Vogue, baybeh.

That’s not all the embarassing 90s fashion trends, but they’re certainly the worse ones. There’s other ones which were less embarassing, but still evoke silly memories (like huge scrunchies, slap bracelets and fake henna tattoos). And how can I do a 90s post without mentioning the Rachel haircut? We had all sorts of silly accessories, weird hair styles and questionable tastes, but I suppose that was half of the fun.

The 90’s for me was the fun part of growing up, exploring colours, trends and making friends, and it really was one unique decade (although the 80’s kids will say different, but don’t listen to them). While it’s weird looking at the kids of today (the tenties?) zoom around with smart phones, iPads, skinny jeans and straightened hair, the inner 90s child with her crimped hair and bright pink Michael Jackson pants knows what they’re missing out on.

I do have to say though, I never did see anyone wearing MC Hammer pants.

Weekly Magical Unicorn Hoodie Links

Weekend time! Here’s some links to get inspired and help you do that thing you always wanted to do…like climb Mount Everest. Okay we both know that’s a big crock of rubbish, so here’s some links to waste time instead.

A photo-journey on the planet Mars. Or perhaps not, just someone’s backyard. I love how close-up photography can create effects like this (and something I need to try myself!)

Remember those adventure books with options on every page to choose your own next step (like ‘pick up the axe and fight a troll, page 23, or run away to the woods, page 76), which you may have a read as a kid? Well here’s an online (blog) version, which you can click your way through, great fun. Although having said that, I did used to try and cheat with those books by bookmarking pages to go back to!

A magical unicorn hoodie-slash-backback. What more do I need to say.

If you’re a big comic book fan, this is a link for you. 60 comics everyone should read, from the superhero greats like Batman and Superman, to the sillies like Matt Groening’s strips. Although I have to say I’ve never really liked the Moomins and would never read a comic about them.

It’s not a good weekend unless there’s some Lego thrown in – here’s some Lego Stilettos, which should have been made years ago, in my opinion.

Teachers who got the last laugh. Unfortunately, none of these went to my school, nor were as cool.

I’ve seen a lot of series of photos of objects which have been taken apart, like these immaculately lined up objects. I liked the Blackberry one best, but that’s just because I don’t like Blackberry phones very much.

Here’s a cool game – Mapcrunch – for those of you who would like to purposely get lost and find you way home in any country, all in the safety of your home on a computer. A bit like a stag night out, I suppose.

A series of photographs of buildings – looking up. I really liked this perspective, and it’s definitely a lot safer than standing on top of a lot of tall buildings and looking down.

Lastly, you know how I love my Disney links – honest titles for Disney films.

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Elmo & Moustache Birthday Cupcakes!

These were some scrumptious and bright orange and red beauties created by my baking genius sister, who made these pretties for my birthday. Not sure which ones were my favourite (there were also cupcakes with my face printed on them, which I LOVED), but we all ooh-ed and ahh-ed over them before we stuffed them down our greedy mouths. They tasted good too, chocolate flavour, in case you wondered.

A very good day was had by all : )

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My Niece’s Cupcakey Aqeeqah Party

We had a family celebration this weekend, which was a lovely celebration for the birth of my newest and tiny-est niece, which is called an ‘Aqeeqah‘ (this is when Muslims will sacrifice an animal as thanks to God for the gift of a new baby, which is then fed to relatives and then to the poor. If you can’t afford that then an alternative is just to give some money to charity). We did something similar for my (slightly older!) niece just a couple of months ago which was also, incidentally pinky and cupcakey, but just as family filled and fun.

There were of course, some seriously beautiful handmade cupcakes and cake pops made by my very talented sister, and plenty of fresh cream cake, presents, balloons and lots of little ‘uns all present – and not least the gorgeous guest of honour who was actually a good girl the whole night and did the nice thing of falling asleep half-way through.

And us being girly-girls, we all dressed up and had sparkly heels on and gossiped through the night with the only interruptions being more cuddly chiddlers with cute, fat hands who kept trying to grab cake they weren’t allowed (my mum horrified the family of a 7-month old cousin by feeding her Coca-Cola, but we just told them that we wouldn’t have been able to stop  her anyway – my mum is of the opinion that a “little bit of the stuff won’t hurt anyone”.)

But anyways, less of my yapping now anyway,  here’s a few pictures of the evening, and of course, the beautiful cakey goodness. Sorry if you’re on a diet. But not really.

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A Ladybird Cupcakes and Iced Trees Tea Party

Started the year with a bit of fun, a Tea Party bridal shower for a friend of mine, mostly full of pretty cupcakes! (The theme was meant to be pink, and the dress code for guests was, of course, pink. Apart from myself and one other girl, no one turned up in pink. Apparently everyone, including the bride-to-be, is colour-blind.)

Nevertheless, it was a fun evening, with the highlight of the evening being some very prettily iced cupcakes. How can you not love cupcake with tiny ladybirds on them, or my personal favourite, a round tree? None of us managed to get to the big red iced shoe at the top though, we left that monster to the bride-to-be : )

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Inside Leeds Castle – A Rich History of books, art and luxuries

The outside of Leeds Castle is beautiful enough, but there’s wonders to be explored inside the Castle, which spans a history of furniture, books and art from the Tudor times to the present day. Every room has its own rich personality, being arranged in a way which displays the beautiful things inside it and makes use out of rich drapings, historical items and gigantic bay windows to throw a romantic light on everything. I had to sift through hundreds of pictures to find the ones I wanted to post, and even these weren’t enough! If you’re interested in history and in English Heritage, then this is definitely the place to go to have a good wander around so you can fully take in the beauty of the interior of this Castle.

My favourite room is of course, the last picture. I’m sure you can imagine why once you have a look at it!

Harlequin Oddities Found About Town: Shoes on a Ceiling

Sometimes, every now and then, you see something which really makes your whole week. In my case, it was these shoes literally walking along the ceiling across shoes shop Dune, which made a really funky form of art (and advertising!). Just be careful that these 4-inchers don’t plonk themselves onto your head as you’re browsing sparkly clogs, although they’ve been stuck up there for a while now. I’m guessing the retailers had The Twits theme in mind when they did this one, they probably used the same Hugtight Super Glue as the lovely Twits couple did too…